Church vs. Ancient Ways


Jez wrote:
> > Greetings  all!
> I took it upon myself to write the Church what I felt was an 
> informative not inflamatory letter.
[SNIP]
> Please let me know how you feel about the letter I sent. I am not 
> worried about any typos in it, it's the content that is important.

        Having read your letter, I have some comments I would like to
make.  I would have preferred to make them before you sent the letter,
but hopefully they'll be of use in future.  (I hope that doesn't sound
as arrogant as I think it does).  I'm going to tell you the changes I
would make to the letter.  Discard them if you like, but please at least
think about them first.

First of all, while it may seem a silly thing, *worry* about typos.
Typos make your work look unprofessional and automatically lower you
a notch in the readers esteem and make them less likely to take you
seriously.  As such I've noted typos where I've spotted them (in square
brackets in your original text.  No offence is intended.

Second of all, your letter is somewhat long-winded.  It can be made much
more concise without losing any of the meaning.

Finally, here is a breakdown of your letter:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
>I am with an organization called Friends of the Earth and before you 
> read any further I only ask of you one thing. Please read with an open
> mind, heart and spirit, for what I am going to say may be of surprise
> to you, yet again it may not."
> This is not a letter trying to convert or condem[n] beliefs held by your
> Church or it's members, it's merely to help inform you of some serious
> accusations and false statements that are being put forth by 
> congregations such as yours. 

Query: what is the point of "congregations such as yours"?  Are you
sending this letter out to churches in general?  I find it reads as
trying to blame all the churches for the blunder of one.

Comment:  I'd stay *well* away from the phrase "serious accusations".
While it's true, it's liable to make the reader defensive, and people
in a defensive mindframe are notoriously closed-minded.

Comment: I think it's a bad idea to state in the first sentence that
you are from Friends of the Earth - this immediately labels you 'the
enemy' before they've even started reading.  "Good day" below was
chosen as being deliberately passive and non-threatening.  Getting
them through the first sentence is half the job done.  (Well, not
really, but you know what I mean :).

I suggest instead something like:  

"Good day.  I am writing to draw to your attention some inaccuracies 
in your recent article on Earth religions ([Insert article
reference here]).  I am a member of the "Friends of the Earth" 
organisations and ask only that you listen to our side of the story
with an open mind."

>I am here to let you know you nor any other Christian needs to fear
>people who believe in what is deemed Earth Religions. Specifically
>Wicca, Paganism, Shamanism, Druidism and many others."

Comment: I don't think suggesting they're afraid is a good move.

Comment: Pedantic grammatical point: "Specifically [...] and many
others" is a contradiction in terms.

In fact, I would probably lose most of this paragraph and roll the
remainder into the next paragraph.

>For centuries we have been tortured, made fun of, ridiculed and called
>Satanists for reasons of instilling fear into the masses. This needs to
>stop. First off, let me inform you that Witches, and Pagans have no 
>connection with the Christian Satan at all. We like to further ourselves
>from that misconception as much as possible. While there are people out
>there who do consider themselves Satanists, or followers of the Satanic
>Church it has nothing and I mean NOTHING to do with our beliefs. 
>Wiccans and Pagans have been suffering from the Church's condemnation
>for centuries because it revolves around Goddess spirituality. The 
>feminine mysteries are not something to be feared but revered. We are 
>very caring, deeply passionate people who beleive in the Wiccan Rede 
>which is "Harm none, do as you will" and the Law of three which is also
>known as Karma. Don't do anything that you wouldn't want coming back to
>you threefold. We have families, we have friends we have beliefs (believe
>it or not) similar to those of Christianity.

>Many Wiccan's/Pagan's have come from strict Christian
>backgrounds and it's not that they have turned their back on it, but
>felt There was something else they just weren't getting. We believe
>there is room on this earth for everyone and everyone's beliefs. Wicca
>is a recognized religion in the United States and is protected by the
>Constitution. There isn't anything we are trying to hide, we aren't 
>trying to make you believe in our path. There are many paths to the
>de[i]vine, and we just want to be recognized for who we really are.
>Our beliefs lie heavily within Nature and the Mother Earth. We 
>celebrate the holidays of the seasons and the moon phases. It really
>is a beautiful spiritual experience that is meant to be embraced, not
>feared.

Comments: Ow!  That first paragraph is *aggressive*.  It sounds as 
though you're accusing the church for the persecution of witches et. 
al.  While this does indeed have some basis in fact, I believe the 
tack to be taken here is one of clearing up a simple misunderstanding.
Attacks lead to defences and before too long people have often forgotten
what the fight was all about in the first place.

Comments: "We like to further ourselves from that misconception as much
as possible".  This is weak.  *My* immediate response was "Well, you
*would* whether it was true or not, wouldn't you?".  Imagine how a
rabid Christian would read it.

Comments: You can't use the Wiccan Rede as a defence for Earth
Religions in general, nor the threefold law.  These are both core
beliefs of Wicca, but are non-existent in many other earth religions.

Comments: What are you trying to achieve by pointing out that Earth
Religions contain some ex-Christians?  It makes it sound like you're
playing "my religion is better than your religion".  Probably true,
but not productive.

Comments: Our religion is great, but explaining it really isn't
necessary - we only have to explain that it's *valid*.  I don't think
we should risk sounding like an advert.

Comments: Stating that there are many paths to the divine will 
immediately get the hackles of a Christian up - they 'know' there is
only one way - through Jesus.

I would suggest something like the following:

"Earth Religions such as Wicca, Paganism, Druidism and Shamanism are
not related to Satanism.  Since Earth Religions are unrelated to 
Christianity the concept of Satan has no more place in them than
it would in Buddhism or Islam.  Earth religions hold only nature as 
being sacred*.  They hold no emnity towards Christianity or any 
other religion and wish only to follow their own religion in peace."

* A simplification, but, IMHO, a necessary one.

>We want to work together with our community and the Churches to prove
>we aren't these storybook ogres that have children for breakfast.
>These rumours are so absolutely absurd, once you do some reasearch
>into what Wicca and Paganism is all about, you, I am sure will agree. 

"I hope that we can clear up these misunderstandings abour our 
religion and become, if not friends, at least peaceable neighbours."

>With recent press over spiritual shops in the Northern California 
>area, I felt it is time to have us come out of the broom closet
>and present ourselves openly to those who may still believe we are
>some terrible devil worshiping cult. That is all lies, and we can no
>longer stand hearing these mistruths without trying to do something to
>correct it.

Comments: "out of the broom closet" is pagan jargon, not really suitable
for a Christian reader.

Comments: "all lies" directly implies that the Church is a liar.  It is
much better if you call them 'misunderstandings' or 'inaccuracies'.

>Christianity has created Satan, Wiccan's and Pagan's were around way 
>before Christianity.

Comments:  Ow!  This is a game of 'my religion is older than your 
religion.  Not productive.

Comments:  'created Satan' is a bad term to use - it implies the 
Christians made the whole thing up.

IMHO lose this entire paragraph.

>Within about a 300 year period called the "Inquisition" headed by the 
>Church of Rome over 9 million people, mostly women in Europe,
> were tortured and killed because of thier ancient beliefs and practices.
>We refer to this time as "The Burning Times". No one should ever have to
>go through such hatred and murder for what their beliefs are. We need to
>practice tolerance of all paths and quit spreading lies about things to
>which we are un-educated about.

Comment: Dragging the inquisition into it can only serve to dredge up
bad feelings.

Comment: "We don't want you to be bad to us any more" is different to
"I hope we can be good to each other".  I prefer the latter.

>I urge you to do some research into Wicca and Pagan practices, not to
>change your belief structure, but to open your eyes to the truth, so 
>you may help counter these vicious attacks.
>I am open to any discussion you might have on this matter. I really am
>not trying to harrass you or lead you into something misguided. There
>are many of us out here who really want to reach out to the Christian
>community and show we are just as wonderful as the next person sitting
>in the pews on Sunday mornings. 

Again, losing the aggressive bit ("counter these vicious attacks") I
would write this something like the following:

"I believe it is only lack of understanding that has lead to conflicts
between our religions.  I would gladly learn more about your religion
that we might be better neighbours, and I hope that you would do the
same for mine.  I have taken the liberty of enclosing some 
informational materials with this letter and hope that you will do
the same in your reply."

>I bid you peace, and thank you so very much for reading this letter 
>through. Sometimes it's hard to put into words how one can feel about
>something so sacred and personal. If you have any questions I am open
>to try and answer them for you in a most truthful and open way.

I would phrase it something like:

"Thank you for your time in reading this letter.  I look forward to 
reading your reply.

>Let us Fight the Fear!

        Again, I find this to be aggressive.  How about something like,
"Let us work towards peace" ?  (Okay, I don't like it that much either,
but something like that.

>Bright Blessings!
>Rev. Sandy Johnson

        You're a Reverend!?

>Director, Friends of the Earth

>P.S. to give you some idea of the organization I am affiliated with I
>have enclosed a pamphlet and a newsletter. This is just for informational
>purposes only, not to convert you to Wicca or Paganism. You can find a 
> wealth of information on our website: http://www.silvermoon.net/fote

Comment: Pedantic grammar point "just [...] only" is a tautology - you
only need one or the other.

Below is a copy of my letter in whole, with a couple of additions that
don't specifically address your letter and so aren't included above 
(and some last minute tweaking);

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Good day.  I am writing to draw to your attention some inaccuracies 
in your recent article on Earth religions ([Insert article
reference here]).  I am a member of the "Friends of the Earth" 
organisations and ask only that you listen to our side of the story
with an open mind.

Earth Religions such as Wicca, Paganism, Druidism and Shamanism are
not related to Satanism.  Since Earth Religions are unrelated to 
Christianity the concept of Satan has no more place in them than
it would in Buddhism or Islam.  In particular, the religion of
modern Witchcraft is based on the belief that mediaeval witches were
not satanists but nature-oriented worshippers mistaken for satanists 
due to the paranoid nature of the times.  Regardless of the truth or
fallacy of this belief, modern Earth religions hold only nature as
being sacred.  They hold no emnity towards Christianity or any other
religion and wish only to follow their own religion in peace.

I believe it is only lack of understanding that has lead to conflicts
between our religions.  I would gladly learn more about your religion
that we might be better neighbours, and I hope that you would do the
same for mine.  I have taken the liberty of enclosing some 
informational materials with this letter and hope that you will do
the same in your reply.  I hope that, with understanding, our religions
can become, if not friends, at least peaceable neighbours.

I particularly wish to clear up the issue of the pentacles (a pentagram
surrounded by a circle) available at the Ancient Ways bookstore in 
.  While it is sadly true that the pentacle has
historically become associated with satanism, it has its origins as a
symbol of protection in pre-mediaeval times.  Modern witches wear it
in that capacity.  Note also that satanists typically choose to wear 
the pentagram inverted (two points upright) much as they often do with
your religion's own cross.

Thank you for your time.  I look forward to your reply and future peace
between our religions.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Incidentally, have you considered sending a letter to the magazine/
newspaper involved?  While it is a good idea to write the church,
the point where this should be addressed seems to be the point at
which it surfaced.

-------------- Revenant [kgb@rosella.apana.org.au] -------------------
"Mankind makes me laugh.  Your kind have convinced themselves they are
the pinnacles of my creation.  Personally, I like dolphins better."
- "God".  The Spectre #61.